Life, Anew..

A hurtful realization dawned on me last night when I received an eye-opening email from my past.

The realization is this:

I can no longer be selfish in baking the cake and eating the entirety of it as well. Firstly, my derriere is large enough, and secondly, I need to learn to let go of certain things, and share it with the world.
In life, sometimes, one needs to let go and move on, as hard as it seems at the time. When holding onto something, or someone for your own selfish reasons, you start toying with their dignity, and where then, is yours? I need to let go, and let him be free of the prison that it is me. Me, being the warden of his broken heart! How cruel am I? Yes, you can say it - truly cruel.

You see, although I mention in my previous post: "the problem with the majority of society today, is that we have an unquenchable thirst or need, if you will, for people to like us, and accept us."  well I am, or one of me, is part of that majority and I cannot let go until I know whole-heartedly that there is no hatred or unsettled matters between both parties. The email I received though changed every notion I had on that conformity and I am seemingly a changed person, or at least my views have been altered drastically.

Having said that I would like to dedicate this post to the man that I've held captive by my selfish ways. I am truly sorry. You can now walk away, dignity intact. You deserve that and every happiness.

..life, anew

I was blinded by my selfishness and you were lost in my prison
Shameful remorse is the feeling for the day
And freedom is yours for eternity
Although we part ways in a seemingly dignified matter
My heart remains unsettled
And my mind still races with ways it could have been done differently
Deserving you are of freedom from the prison that is me,
Deserving you are of another that can love you like I couldn't.
My hopes and dreams for you remain the same.
Succeed and achieve all you desire
And although you desire me, my picture and your love for me will pass like the seasons in a year.
I will fade into a distant memory,
And my conviction for this truly selfish act, will be to remember.
Remember everything

So here is to a life, anew. Live it, breathe it, and find happiness in every action and every moment, and remember that the selfish acts one dares to dare or dream, could result in a lifetime conviction of remembrance.

Sincerely,
Lauren