Ego: Through the Fire & into the Belly of The Beast

Part Two:

Running is easy.

Sprinting through the fire and into the belly of The Beast is easier.

The days that followed my encounter with the Ultimate Casanova have been capricious. My erratic behavior noticeable and questioned.

Oh, the Holy Grail. Ego handed me a golden goblet filled with all-mighty destruction and watched as I gulped, greedily. His smile was laced with malevolence as he rubbed his palms together.

Now I stare into the hazel eyes of the one I truly love. My heart breaks, piece by piece, as the obliteration of our relationship continues.

I question him.
I doubt him.
I fear him.

Broken. His fragile heart.

Mere words. Murder. The world around us is deafening. The silence emphatic. It only took a juncture for the flames to rise from beneath our mangled bodies and burn our souls. The rambunctious words of total annihilation kept pouring from my tainted lips. I willed myself to stop, but to no avail. All I could do was cry.

Cry for him.
Cry for his soul.
Cry for his torn love.

I can tell you this. He loves me. Irrevocably. But to his detriment? To mine?

Ego can taint a person. Ego can change one's thought process. Ego can infect your immune system. Ego can alter you. But there is hope. There has to be.

I sit. Watching. Watching his every move. For fear of him meeting someone that'll steal his heart - knowing full well that his heart has already been stolen. I am surrounded by an ocean of people exuding happiness, anger, sadness. But none of these emotions matter to me. The noise fades into nothing as Fear consumes me and invites Jealousy to accompany us into the darkness that looms around the corner.

It starts in my toes, spreading up to my ankles, entwining around my carves like vines - creeping slowly, poisoning my synapses. The venom spreads throughout my body, corrupting and influencing every thought and every action. I lose control. All of me - contaminated by Ego's malice.

Ego, wretched Ego.

I drop to my knees, drowning in the crowd, surrounded by an illusion of people who are better than me, more attractive, intelligent, challenging. I scream inwardly. I weep tears of silence and imprison my unwanted guests - Doubt, Jealousy and Fear - knowing that they'll escape and attack in the unpredictable future.

One
Two
Three
Four

Days pass by. I endeavor to restrain my prisoners. I'm strong, but the uninvited are stronger. United they stand. United they escape. United they attack. Pouncing on their unsuspecting victim.

His expression drips with a thousand unspoken words. His hazel eyes saddened. His beautiful face is warped, he shakes his head in sorrow and disbelief as I attack him for reasons that I have created. Reasons that were artistically painted on a canvas of delusion with the help of my fellow artists.

My words cut like a thousand blades - laced in assumption and misconception.
Suddenly, I stop. I listen. I hear the insanity.

I whisper the words: "I'm sorry".

To be continued...